Archive for the ‘Film Reviews’ Category

Wishlist : Terminator 5

August 21, 2009 1 comment

Before I begin my continuation on the Terminator topic, heres a small synopsis of McG’s vision for the sequel:

In statements to FilmJournal, McG further reveals his plans to have the movie set in 2011, pre-Judgment Day. Skynet has figured out how to send non-Infliltrator Terminators such as Hunter-Killers and Harvesters through Time Displacement EquipmentJohn Connor is also sent back through time to fight the machines using present day military tactics and technology. While in the past, he meets up with the scientist played by Robert Patrick. [2] Rumors have been circulating that the next film will take place in modern day London, despite the fact that Terminator 3 shows Judgment Day happening in 2004. [3]

McG also hinted that John could very well end up meeting his mother Sarah upon going back in time. [4]

Love it or hate it this vision is not going to do any good if kept the way it is. There are a few rules which you should never cross. Rules define existence and if you break rule then you loose definition. Unlike the media branding which always projects breaking rules as something heroic-it is not so if not done decisively.And that is exactly what I must suggest to McG when he is hell bent on breaking rules even before he fully understands the rules that define the Franchise.

Exclusive: Terminator 5 promotional poster....

Exclusive: Terminator 5 promotional poster....

Anyway the focus of this post is not McG bashing but to see how Terminator 5 can be a less Epic fail than it already is.So lets roll………. Read more…


Terminator Salvation: First Impressions

June 26, 2009 3 comments

Finally I got time to watch the most awaited movie of this Summer. Though the movie was released on May 21st, it was last week that I managed some time to go and watch it,mostly because of my travel to Europe and all.  Its been more than 4 years that the last movie abomination was released and the memories of the previous episodes were begining to fade.So before I went to the movie, I made sure that I had watched the first three installments to go to the movie fully prepared and also to come back with an unbiased view which had already become an object of introspect after I read about the reviews online. To tell you the truth I believe I have got an unbiased view on this movie and theres just so much to write. So I will focus on the first impressions and a short review of the movie here before taking on more intellectually challenging topics in my following posts. A few days back I was asked to review Crank 2 but I think the bitching can wait a post or two. It is imperative that the robot apocalypse gets the first precedence and hey ! Arnie is there !!!



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Top 12 factors that prove Harry Baweja promotes “cloning” ……

April 29, 2009 Leave a comment

*This was something that I noted down a long time back after I watched Love Story : 2050.I wanted to elaborate on each of those points with sufficient justification but given the Epic Failure in the box office I think now that there isn’t any needed. Also this post will not affect the box office anymore. You can totally stay away form this post if you do not like reading about jumbled thoughts. This was something which I was going to delete today but thought of posting it for the benefit of the 50 daily visitors who visit my site even if I do not post. Usual disclaimers apply.*

12.Background music cloned from Depesche Mode

Just as it says,listen to Depesche mode-a pretty old and rare one and then try listening to the background score …so many times I just couldn’t do away with that strange feeling….

11.The futuristic Mumbai-cloned from various hollywood blockbusters and fresh out of the box

10.Robot assembly lines-cloned from I robot

9.Flying yellow  vehicles in Mumbai-cloned from Bruce Willis starrer Fifth Element

8.QT-cloned from Robin William’s Bicentennial man

7.Wowwee clones and manufactures the same 2008 toys in 2050

6.Starwars clone wars holographic communication projectors-cloned and fitted with the pinnacle of desi desire-kantabai

5.For some strange reason Xbox 360 is still called Xbox 360-hinting at possible cloning after violent fanbase demands

4.Tube-light sabers cloned from star wars jedi light sabers

3.Dr.Yoshi cloned straighted from Darth Vader

2.Dr.Ya cloned from Einstein

1.Harman Baweja Cloned from Hritik Roshan

Aa Dekhen Zara : The Review

April 21, 2009 Leave a comment

People who read my previous rant should know that this was coming. A detailed and engaging view on “Aa Dekhen Zara”.I cannot recall when in recent times I have written two reviews back to back but it seems that happy times are back for my blog.  Anyway, more than a year back I wrote a review of the Neil Mukesh Starrer  “Johnny Gaddar” . I have mentioned there that this new lad showed promise. And he doesn’t disappoint here either. The only things I didn’t think has gone quite right here is the fact that his role has become a lot stereotypical. He is dirt poor, he gets a means to make lot of money not through conventional means and finally pumping up adrenaline to make the end justify the means. But this movie is not about Neil only-theres a lot into it.Lets start with the trailer:

Synopsis: Neil is an extremely poor  freelance photographer often having his a$$ boned by camera thieves,goons and of course,credit card recovery agents. Whatever meager means he has is because of a not so generous editor of a newspaper. One fine day he gets  a news that his photography mentor- his grandfather has expired and he should be there at his house to pay his respects.He goes there and comes to know from his advocate that his grandfather was working on something that made him take huge loans against his assets. Also he left a letter for Neil.

The letter...

The letter...

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8X10 Tasveer : The review

April 20, 2009 Leave a comment

Haven’t been following up with the latest bollywood releases lately. However the occasional trailers that forcefully numb you senses when surfing through the available bouquet of mostly useless and uninspiring satellite channels made me put two movies in the “should watch” list and 8×10 being the one- the other is “AAn dekhe Zara”. Now when it comes to Akshay Kumar movies, I find them as a sadistic orgasm of inflections with a bully-ing drawl and attitude , attitude and some more attitude- all the while every other co-actors cowering to the cornermost part of the frame to save their pony a$$es from the entire me-me-me blastorgasm. But you cannot deny the fact that despite his stereotypical bullying and drawlish inflections , he is one of the top tier paid actors in Bollywood today. So usually given a choice I tend to pass Akki-movies.However this time even the trailer was replete with intellect-as well as an indication of a possible mind f*ck… so this time I decided to treat this as an exception and watch this movie.

A short synopsis: Akshay Kumar is Jay- the only immediate heir to a very rich oil tycoon. He has chosen his life with the environment and works as a Forest Ranger to earn his living in the deep woods of  Canada. He is married/living together with Ayesha Takia in a small forest cabin and has dislike about his father’s business possibly due to the eco reasons. Also Jay can look into a photograph and figure out the few moments surrounding the time the photographs were taken. Literally he gets into the picture -though for only 60 seconds beyond which he barely has a chance to live nay longer.In this premise good old dad dies in a fell-from-boat-and-died-of-heart attack-in cold water event. People see this as an accident converging with the fact that dad already survived two strokes. In comes Happi (Happy with an i)- some paranoid ex police guy once helped by dad and thinks that this may be a murder since Jay’s mom denied a post mortem. Also a picture of the entire group was taken moments before the accident.Armed with it Jay sets out to find the killer and what follows is a rare cocktail of suspense and thrill coupled with a big time(though formula oriented) revelation that takes the viewer through a wonderful joyride of entertainment. Read more…

The Eye : A Blind Review

April 13, 2009 Leave a comment

I am holding my insatiable lust for movies for a while-actually I am busy collecting them. Why am I doing that ? well, we will know in course of time and that will be the topic of another post. But it is sufficient to know that I am saving it all for the rainy days.I am building a huge ark full of at least two specimens of each genre of good english language movies which will help me tide through an upcoming drought. Even though I am trying to play Noah in a film school way yet I am still a puny human being all the while vulnerable to urges. So this weekend my self imposed restraint was broken and I pulled out a horror movie with a seemingly horrifying name- The Eye.



Now before you conjure up a wrinkled  face and some grotesque interpretation of an eyeball stuck onto it,I am going to slap your imagination right on the face by saying that the first thing you see something that remotely is related to the eyeball is ….. an eyeball….in a face….. wearing dark glasses in soft sunlight….. slowly sipping iced tea…. and thinking aloud a lot of things read from the epilogue of the biography of a pink pony! And the face in question is of Jessica Alba.

Sun on the face.....sipping iced tea..... acting blind .....

Sun on the face.....sipping iced tea..... acting blind .....

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How the end may begin

December 15, 2008 1 comment

*The post is purely speculative in nature and whatever I infer or conclude here is solely based on the numerous publications and the recent trailer released about the movie and is by all legal and illegal means to be considered as a product of my brilliant imagination.McGee said umpteen number of times after the CHUD spoiler leak that only three people on the face of this planet know of the exact ending of Terminator Salvation and I am not one of those.*

While I watched the newly released US,UK and Japanese trailers repeatedly for enough number of times,I somehow had the feeling that in order to make this movie a real epic war story which will have enough fodder left for the next two films,the ending has to be totally outrageous.It should be something grand and spectacular and it should give the already cliched Terminator fans some new food for thought.And obviously though spectacular in nature the CHUD leak was a total WTF.What i mean is its not just simple to rip off some dude’s skin and fit it onto a metal standard issue Titanium endo-skeleton,the model of which was Arnold for crying out loud.Further how the living cells and tissues will survive on the Titanium is beyond any possible reason.So heres what I really think the ending should be like to make it SPECTACULAR.

Spectacular what ?? Dude you have to have red eyes to know even half of that

Spectacular what ?? Dude you have to have red eyes to know even half of that

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